Friday, November 13, 2009

Reason #874 I married Guy

[the TV room/den/guest room, Pixie reading an issue of Yoga Journal while Guy surfs the web on the nearby computer]

Guy: So how much vacation time do you have to use up before the 24th?
Pixie: 67 hours.
Guy: Wait--like...
Pixie: As in eight days and three hours.
Guy: Damn! [pause] Huh...

[silence for about five minutes; college football plays on the TV on low volume]

Guy: So...I know we're going to St. Louis for Christmas, but...what if you went to visit your mom and sister for a while in December?
Pixie: I can't go til after the 8th--that's when Tumbleweed County's CDs are due.
Guy: Well, but maybe you could go after that, like the week before Christmas. Look, you could fly out--
Pixie: [exasperatedly drops magazine into her lap] I can't afford to fucking fly at Christmas, Guy. I checked into it--it's well over $300 to fly from Denver to Atlanta and then to St. Louis. I'm about to be out a week's worth of pay. I can't afford to go anywhere with all this time off.
Guy: Well then, I'll pay for it.
Pixie: [blank look] But...well, I don't know when I could pay you back; it'd be spring before I could.
Guy: You wouldn't have to. I owe you, actually.
Pixie: Wait, I paid you for the new iPods, but--
Guy: [turning fully to Pixie] Look: I sponged offa you for a long time. When we first moved in together, you paid way more of the bills than I did while I paid off my student loans.
Pixie: Well, you had student loans and I didn't.
Guy: Pix, I can actually afford it. I've got my emergency fund paid up, my Roth IRA is maxed out for the year, and I can even make a mortgage payment for you and buy your tickets to Atlanta.
Pixie: [pinched mouth, looking unsure]
Guy: [cute voice] Aaaall you have to do is say yeee-eeees...
Pixie: [sighs] Well....
Guy: [turns back to computer] It's decided. you're going to Georgia. You can leave the 12th and fly back on the 20th...


Craig said...


Just remember marriage isnt always 50-50 but it will all even out in the end.

Plus I love the posts from you and Kitty when your all together. Hopefully you two will roll out some more "Ask Mom" posts!

Miss Kitty said...

Guy is full of WIN and AWSUM! :-) EPIC XMAS WIN!!!!!

BaxtersMum said...

Clone Guy and send clone to Vegas.


Miss Kitty said...

Craig, thanks for reminding me. I have yet another awesome "Ask Mom" waiting in the wings--a special Thanksgiving edition, no less. :-)