Thursday, August 16, 2007

I get by with a little help from my friends

There was a second part to my tale of weirdness and woe yesterday, which I should at least mention now. First, thanks to all who commented with such support and good advice. I also got some good advice from my friend Vinnie today, now a psychologist but formerly an antiques dealer back east in Trenton, NJ (ahem). He advised, just as Guy did, not to laugh at CEO Plankton's jokes and to talk with Alex about this guy's behavior, mostly as an FYI that this guy was setting off my fruitcake-Geiger counter. Also, be good and super-early for the Wednesday meetings in order to take away CEO-P's one source of childish power.

Rewind, if you will, back to yesterday afternoon, when I finally got to the office after this wretched meeting. I was so frustrated that I think Elliot and Derek saw steam coming off of me. Now, Elliot will get worked up with me when I'm pissed, but Derek is Mr. Calm. Nowadays since his little daughter was born a few months ago, he's Mr. Super Grand Funk Calm. "Having a little one puts things in perspective," he said. "You see how ridiculous a lot of stuff is. And you see how useless a lot of stress's just worthless." As I told the story of my meeting, Derek nodded empathetically. "Man, that's really painful," he said. "That is so frustrating and awful! You can't even do anything because he's the CEO!"

Me: I wish I could. He acts like a child, for crying out loud.
Derek: Maybe next meeting, you bring doughnuts.
Me: Hmph. I oughta bring some pot brownies.
Derek: Haaaaahahaha! That'd be great! Pot brownies at 8am and then--[enticing voice] "It's ten o'clock--who's ready for lunch?"
Me: [singsong] Iiiiiii brooooooght Dor-eee-toooooos!
Derek: Haahahaaa! Bring in some big mylar balloons with smiley faces on them and hand them to him. [mimes holding out some balloon strings] "Someone needs cheering up!"
Me: Baaahahahaaaaa! Or give him a squeaky toy to squeeze when he gets mad! "How dare you be two minutes late--" [squeezing hand rapidly in air] honkahonkahonka!
Derek: Haahahaaa! Throw a chew toy in the floor and let him romp!
Me: [gasping for breath] Put him in timeout if he's gonna act like a child!
Derek: [miming holding out a doll] "Does someone need to sit in the corner and hold Time Out Timmy for a little while? Hmm?"
Me: BAAAAHAHAHAAAA!!! [slumping over on desk]

I was bound to start crying, so at least I got to do it while laughing instead of being scared and sad. Ultimately, I can take some of his power away by not playing into his power games--no laughing, keep all dialogue and responses professional and business-only, get to meetings really early so he can't bitch about that--and then call his bluff by making sure Alex is aware of CEO Fucktard's belligerent behavior and management-by-threats-and anger. Although calling it 'management' is a strong word. He acts less like a CEO and more like an alcoholic stepfather in a trailer park.

But in other news, I got approval from the radiology department users on the redesign of the department, and CDs will be done in two more weeks. At least the actual users are a joy to work with.


Charlotte said...

You totally mentioned my hometown! (Trenton, NJ). Yay!

Sorry I had a moment of hometown pride.

ms. kitty said...

I just read in an article in Psychology Today about hypersensitive-to-rejection people. They tend to come unglued over something like a person's being late---it really punches that "I'm being rejected" button, and that's often a sign of narcissism, which it sure sounds like your Nemesis.

Miss Kitty said...

Would you like for me to drop a big BBQ fart on him?