Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Viva Hurl Vegas

We arrived in Las Vegas on Saturday morning, picked up the rental car, and made a beeline for the outlet mall in Primm, just south of the Strip. After a successful trip (including picking up a gorgeous long black gown at the BCBG Max Azria outlet for 65% off), we headed back to the Strip and checked into the hotel--the Palazzo at the Venetian. I got ready to go out to a restaurant and a Cirque de Soleil show while Guy took a little nap on the luxurious fluffy bed. After we walked down to New York New York casino, Guy picked up our tickets...

...and turned pale.

We sold our tickets back to the box office and barely made it back to the hotel/resort/casino in time for Guy to succumb to the same stomach flu I had at the start of February.

Guy spent the next day and a half laying in the hotel room, subsisting on fruit juice, Gatorade, and water. He finally emerged to have some breakfast (a smoothie), one poker tournament, and dinner at Emeril's Table 10 restaurant in the Palazzo on Monday, the day of our 3rd anniversary. He didn't eat much, but we both found room for gelato--who couldn't, says I? He was still tired when we flew home Tuesday and stayed home from work today. (Somehow, he found energy to do some touch-up painting around the house, so Shorty is impressed.)

I dined alone for dinner twice, and nothing is as depressing as dining alone in Vegas when that wasn't the point. I felt like a widow: "What brings you to Vegas?" "My anniversary." "Oh, where's your husband." "He's not here..." "Oh..." However, my days were pretty fun--I got a stone massage, a body wrap, a manicure and pedicure, a rock wall-climbing lesson (I bruised my knee but I did pretty well, though nearly pissing my pants while doing so), and a fitness assessment. Interestingly, my body fat percentage increased (21.2% up from 18.8% in 2007), but so did my overall strength and performance. Evidently, I was overtraining last year and working way too hard. I wasn't giving my body enough of a rest to recover and get stronger.

With the addition of the Palazzo at the Venetian, they added a huge mall with had a lot of super-high-end stores, like Diane von Furstenburg, Coach, Michael Kors, Jimmy Choo, Ferragamo, and a three-story Barney's of New York. I couldn't help but indulge my inner fashionista and even try on a few things, but my inner Go Fug Yourself girl had to make fun of some things as well. I'll post photos of the trip soon with appropriate heckles attached.

I returned to work this morning to get kidney-punched by Squidwort in a meeting, Zahara fervently apologizing: "He had all these questions yesterday and bombarded me with them! You were gone, cuz otherwise I would have warned you! I'm so sorry! He's such a fucking jerk!" Even my mild-mannered superintendent, Herman, muttered on the phone with me this afternoon, "What a tool." Squiddy sure knows how to welcome a girl home.

At least I got to have one lovely dinner with my smoochybear. I think we need a do-over. Maybe for our birthday? My work pal Ethel said, "I was thinking your do-over should be in April!" Not a bad idea.


Miss Kitty said...

Poor Guy. And I should let a big, liquidy fart on Squidwort when I tum to see. :-P

Wilderness Gina said...

Does yur Gut know you call him "smoothybear" on the Net in front of God and the rest of us? Poor fella. Gets deathly ill for his anniversary and is smoochybear-ed all in the same week.

faded said...

Myabe you can take Squidwort with you the next time and drowned him in one of the canals at the Venetian.

Miss Kitty said...

Faded, that is totally brilliant.