Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Scenes from a site walk, or, Adventures with Contractors

[Pixie, Yuri, Boris, and Ivan walk through part of an area under renovation in the Bierstadt Building on a weekly morning sitewalk]

Boris: So, we're wondering if we can remove this and maybe connect the casework and countertop all the way around the room... [puts his hand on a drywall bumpout in the corner of a room]
Pixie: Well, depends. Is there anything in there? Is it furring out around some pipes or something?
Ivan: I don't think so. Not that we could see from a ladder looking down into it.
Boris: Well, let's open it up and see. [turns around and shouts] Can we get a sledgehammer over here?
Yuri: [wordlessly lifts up size-16 workboot and stomps it through the drywall of the bumpout]
Boris: [turns around and shouts] Cancel the sledgehammer--we brought Yuri.

[The construction team inspects an exterior wall. Vlad arrives.]
Vlad: So, we should be getting the new storefront framing next week, so we can start demo of this existing storefront on Friday.
Pixie: Right on. I'd like to look at that ledge up on top of these windows. Is that just steel?
Boris: [cranes neck to look up] Yeah, just red iron. It's all over this building.
Yuri: [sits down a ladder near the exterior wall] Here you go, Pix.
[Pixie climbs the ladder and gets to the next-to-top step.]
Pixie: Um, I can't see the top, guys...
Yuri: [calls over shoulder] We need a taller ladder!
Pixie: [climbing down off ladder] You need a taller architect.

[The team proceeds into the main electrical room, where panels are being replaced and added.]
Vlad: We've gotten all the fireproofing in the wall penetrations here, so that's good.
Boris: Have you seen the fireproofer's ride? It's a van that looks just like the Mystery Machine!
Yuri: No way! Really?
Boris: Totally! He takes it to car shows--
Pixie: --parks it outside elementary schools, holds a bag of fun-size Snickers out the window...
Yuri: [struggles to stifle laughter] Oh, God, Pixie...


Willderness Gina said...

(Re: 'taller architect') OR you could get a masonary block and lean something up 'gainst it to discize it! Yeah! Winner all round!

Miss Kitty said...

HAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! For once, a fun site visit!